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The More You Weigh the Harder You are to Kidnap... Funny Beer Quotes

Think about it." -- Hunter S. Thompson, writer & rocker of Hawaiian shirts "Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world." -- Jack Nicholson, actor & professional Lakers fan "Never underestimate.


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Being half drunk is wasted money. We have an open-door policy: bring beer, and we will open the door. There are two reasons for drinking: one is when you are thirsty, to cure it; the other, when you are not thirsty, to prevent it. (Thomas Love Peacock, English novelist, 1785-1866)


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84 Funny Quotes On Beer: The Most Popular Drinking Quotations Leave a Comment / / By John Whitlock Cheap beer has a tendency of highlighting a person's idiosyncrasies. Intoxicated individuals will say and do things they would never consider doing sober.


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"If you can't laugh at yourself, crack open another beer and try again." "Beer: Because sometimes one great punchline is all you need." "Why did the beer cross the road? To get to the party on the other side!" "A good beer and a good laugh: the ultimate stress relievers." "Laughter is the best medicine, but beer is a close second."


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185 Funny Beer Quotes to Help You Seem Clever Beer 101 quotes 4 Drinking is easy. Anyone with a mouth can do it. It takes a special kind of beer "power user" to sit at the corner of the bar and fire off a great quote at just the right moment and light up the faces of those around them. Are you ready to be the George Wendt of your local bar?


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1. "Wish you were beer." 2. I think I'll have a salad for lunch. "Beer is made from Hops! Hops are plants. Beer= Salad! You're welcome." 3. A beer a day keeps reality away. "Drink this much.


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Funny Beer Phrases Hey, beer or teddy bear both give a feeling of soft mind and fluffy like in the air, lightweight, well after drinking, if you feel very light tension free and get out of your mind, then here is a list of funny beer phrases. It was a woman who drove me to drink; I feel like getting pushed to the scuppers


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"I'm a beer man. I tried to drink whiskey and Scotch, but I don't get it. It smells like a girl who didn't shower and just splashed a lot of perfume on." MADS MIKKELSEN "It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth." GEORGE BURNS


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212 Copy quote Show source Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called everybody, and they meet at the bar. Drew Carey Funny, Sarcastic, Jobs 46 Copy quote I drink when I have occasion, and sometimes when I have no occasion. Miguel de Cervantes Drinking, Beer, Alcohol 21 Copy quote Show source


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Funny Beer Quotes: Cheers to Frosty Mugs and Good Times By Dan Smullen Beer Is My Life » Beer » Beer Quotes Picture yourself at a party or a gathering with friends, sipping on a cold beer and enjoying the moment. Wouldn't it be great to have a couple of funny beer quotes, ready to make everyone laugh and raise their glasses to toast?


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1. Don't worry, BEER happy! 2. Love is ALE we need. 3. I give into beer pressure. 4. It's beer o'clock somewhere! 5. I am silently judging your beer selection! 6. Do you know what rhymes with Friday? Beer. 7. Beer makes everything better! 8. I tried running. Gave it up. I kept spilling my beer. 9. Life is BREW-tiful! You know what time it is…


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Beergasm: the climactic moment when you try a REALLY good beer. I don't care if the glass is half empty or half full… As long as it has beer in it. You know who deserves a beer tonight? Read that first word again. Beer is good but beers are better. Drink triple, see double, act single. Don't think of it like a beer.


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"Life is too short to drink bad beer." "Beer is the ultimate wingman." "I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I prefer it cold and refreshing." "Beer is liquid therapy." "The best things in life are brew-tiful." "Beer: because adulting is hard." "I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right… with a beer in my hand."


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"Nothing is more expensive than the first beer." - French Proverb "This leads to the great theory of human history: that we didn't start farming because we wanted food—there was loads of that around. We started farming because we wanted booze." - Mark Forsyth "Well, yeah it doesn't really allow my dice to roll and by dice I mean testicles.


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"Ways to my heart: buy me beer, pour me beer, take me out for beers." "Us: we're only having one beer tonight. Narrator: they did not only have one beer." "Crush the workout. Drink the beer. Cut the toxic people out of your life. Repeat." "Not to toot my own horn, but I'm, like, really good at drinking beer."


5 Beer Puns That Will Never Get Old Unsobered

Teach a man to brew, and waste a lifetime!". ― Bill Owen. "Wine is complicated, beer is complex.". ― Brett Joyce. "He was a wise man who invented beer.". ― Plato. "A bottle of beer contains more philosophy than all the books in the world.". ― Louis Pasteur. "Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world.".